Irreversible (2002)
What at first looked like a pretentious art film has now turned into one of
my favorite movies of the last decade. Don't judge this film by the
frenetic style of the first twenty minutes as it is all a means to draw the
viewer in and create and unforgettable experience. We start with a crime
scene and work backwards through a vicious beating, a vicious rape, and a study
of two people in love. In a narrative similar to "Memento", the
film is shown in pieces going back in time which I found worked a hundred times
better than "Memento" and evoked 
feelings
in the viewer that would not have been there had the narrative taken place in a
standard linear format. Although I felt assaulted during the opening third
of the movie, by the end I felt reflective and frankly quite depressed. I
do not want to give away anything regarding the plot as I do not want to
ruin anything but this is easily one of the most engrossing movies I have seen
in a while. The performances by real life husband and wife Vincent Cassel and
Monica Bellucci (both from "Brotherhood Of The Wolf"), as well as that
of Albert Dupontel were believable and passionate. It should be
noted that this movie contains one of the longest and most vicious scenes of
sexual assault that I have ever witnessed. A brutal yet exhilarating film
that will go down in history as one of the most innovative.
Visitor Q (2001)
Of the Takashi Miike movies I have seen in the last couple of years, this one
has to be the weirdest and most disturbing. While not a conventional plot
by any means, what I got from this is that we have a messed up family and how
they are affected by dad doing a reality documentary on his son being bullied
and by a strange houseguest who meets the family by hitting dad on the head with
a rock. Along our journey we also discover that mom and sister are
prostitutes, dad has a problem with premature ejaculation (especially while
screwing his daughter), mom is also a heroin addict who can squeeze a lot of
milk out of her nipples, dad likes to have sex with corpses, the houseguest
knows how to operate a video camera (especially when dad is raping and killing a
co-worker), and son enjoys beating his mom and leaving welts. While this
all sounds really great, I find that most Miike films (with the exception of
"Audition") have a tendency to have a number of standout sequences but
tend to drag in the time between these sequences. In the case of
"Visitor Q", the lack of a plot definitely detracts from the whole
experience and makes this drag time a lot worse than when there are motivated
characters. If you can, however, embrace the weirdness and obscenity of it
all, this one will stick with you for a long time and will leave you thinking
about what you have witnessed and why. I have heard a lot about this movie
and it is a favorite of cult movie fans. I can understand as this is
something that you have definitely never seen before and are unlikely to ever
see again.
Rock 'n' Roll Nightmare
(1987)
Straight out of a b-movie primer, this one is loaded with enough silliness
and bare breasts that you will not be bored. 80's rock god Jon-Mikl Thor
stars as John Triton, the singer of a rock band who have taken residence in a
country house to record their new album. Along for the ride are the
annoying manager who should have been played by Corey Haim, the annoying
arrogant Aussie drummer who loses his accent halfway through, the socialite snob
who repeatedly takes her top off, and the cute keyboard player who appears to be
following the ice cube rule from "Showgirls". Although most of
these cast members are cookie cutter victims and although Thor could use some
acting lessons, he commands the screen especially at the end when he strips down
to a studded leather bikini bottom and an impossibly hairsprayed mane.
There are also some useless groupies, sock puppet monsters, a number of Thor
songs performed in their entirety by the band, a silly Satan monster that
looked like one of the real Thor's stage props, a long van driving scene
(probably to fit in another Thor song), a shower scene with Thor and his
girlfriend, and a cheesy skeleton in an oven that looks like the cheesy skeleton
that rises from the grave in "Return Of The Living Dead".
Director John Fasano went on to write and produce "Darkness
Falls". Thor was also in "Zombie Nightmare" with Tia
Carrere and has been enjoying a comeback in 2003 with an appearance in the
short film "Graveyard" with Joey Shithead from punk band D.O.A. as
well as a new album. If you are a fan of campy rock & roll horror
b-movies, you must track this one down!
Massive Retaliation
(1984)
I remember the time in my life when this movie was made and how there was a
lot of hype about how the US and Russia were going to go to war and I remember
it being a frightening thought. This movie plays on that fear where a war
actually breaks out and the major cities are evacuated. What this does of
course is create a sense of panic as people are being told to leave their homes
immediately and are totally unprepared. Our main characters, however, are
prepared and are what are known as survivalists, or people who have stocked up
guns, food, gasoline, and the like for just this type of situation. The
leader of the pack is Lee Briscoe (Peter Donat from "The X-Files") who
is fanatical about their security and their independence from the outside
world. He is joined by his wife (Karlene Crockett), a computer guy (Tom
Bower), his annoying wife (Marilyn Hassett), a loudmouth friend (Michael
Pritchard), and his take-charge wife (Susan O'Connell). Things begin to
break down amongst the group when their children fail to arrive at the
designated time and the group begins to disagree about the rules they established
in the event of such a national emergency. I found the dynamics of the
group to be quite interesting and many moral questions were raised about how one
would handle such an abnormal situation and would we turn on our neighbors when faced with long-term survival in the event of a war on our own soil.
I thought the ending was pretty cheeseball but I appreciate the message it was
trying to convey. It is difficult to relate to the mentality of these
characters as that type of paranoia has been gone for quite some time but it did
remind me of the era when my age reached the double digits. This would
have been a lot more effective had I seen it in the time it was set. Look
for Jason Gedrick (TV's "Boomtown") as Briscoe's eldest son and well
as Johnny Weissmuller Jr. and Bobcat Goldthwait (in his screen debut) as a
couple of rednecks. Weissmuller and Pritchard both played card players in
the "Ewoks: Battle For Endor" TV movie.
Return Of The Street
Fighter (1974)
I remember being a little underwhelmed with the original "Street
Fighter" movie. The reputation it has earned over the years had me
expecting a kung fu gorefest with so much action, I wouldn't be able to handle
it. Unfortunately, that was not the way I saw it and I thought it was a
little dull. So, why on earth would I bother with "Return Of The
Street Fighter". Well, for starters, I was at IHOP eating pancakes
one day and a friend of a friend gave me the box set on video tape for some
reason. It sat on my bookcase for some time but last Sunday, I decided to
throw it on and pass some time. I found the sequel more
entertaining than the original and there was a fight scene every five minutes.
They fought in the snow, in a spa, at a police station, on the street, and in a
number of other places. You also have a lead bad guy looking like Chris
Robinson from the Black Crowes on a bad day and I was quite entertained.
This movie played out to me like a blaxploitation movie with Sonny Chiba playing
the hero part and oozing cool. I dug it and am starting to see why Chiba
has become such a cult icon. I am also wondering if maybe the version of
the original I saw was an R-rated cut. It was a long time
ago, maybe it's time to revisit it.
Flesh For The Beast
(2003)
It is rare these days to get a horror b-movie that is not just softcore with
a minor horror element but not as rare as it was a few years ago. Not
knocking Seduction Cinema and companies like it but I have been waiting for a b-movie
to come along with a good story and some
make-up effects in addition to the T&A. Well the wait is over with
"Flesh For The Beast" as we have a lead actress (Jane
Scarlett) who knows what she is doing and a director (Terry M. West) who knows
how to move things along. The premise involves a group of paranormal
investigators who are hired to explore a former whorehouse and soon meet us with
the former residents who are now succubi. While not the most original of
plots, it is executed well and relies on more than the ample nudity to carry the
film. There are also a number of gory deaths, some creature effects, and
brief cameos from genre vets Caroline Munro ("Maniac") and Aldo
Sambrell ("Killer Barbies"). I know that the golden age of the
scream queen is dead but "Flesh For The Beast" should be enough to
satisfy those who miss the heydays of Brinke Stevens, Linnea Quigley, and
Michelle Bauer. Think "Nightmare Sisters" if it were directed by
Jess Franco. Director Terry West honed his craft with Seduction Cinema
films like "Satan's School For Lust" as did a number of the female
cast members including Ruby Larocca and Barbara Joyce Maybe other
filmmakers will take note and see that you can still make a good b-movie that
does not have to wallow in it's own weirdness or be a plotless lesbian orgy.
Let Sleeping Corpses
Lie (1974)
As one of my favorite zombie movies, this atmospheric shocker from director
Jorge Grau plays it simple. Instead of having hordes of the undead
attacking the living, we are treated to a rare look at the beginning of the
phenomena in a small British town and two unlucky people who happen to to get
mixed up in all the mayhem. Ray Lovelock ("Autopsy") stars as
George, an antiques dealer from 
London
who is on his way to make a delivery to a small shop in a rural town.
Along the way, he meets Edna (Cristina Galbo from "What Have They Done To
Solange") by way of her running over his motorbike with her mini. As
he in unharmed but his bike is trashed, they decide that she will give him a
lift to his destination. All is fine until Edna is left alone in the car
while George asks for directions. A zombie shows up and things don't let
up from here. It turns out that a new pest control device also has the
effect of bringing the dead back to life. What I really loved about this
movie is that every scene has a desperate tone as George and Edna are
trying to convince people as to what is happening. Add to this the fact
that George is a hippie type and that the epidemic is just beginning and the
suspense climbs to an above average extent. The gore quotient is decent as
well with a few chowdowns, a breast ripping, and some eyeball violence.
Also starring Arthur Kennedy as one of the most ignorant asshole cops ever
committed to screen. The movie was also known as "Breakfast At The
Manchester Morgue" and "Don't Open The Window".
The Blood Of Fu Manchu
(1968)
After seeing this I have to admit that maybe I was wrong about Jess
Franco. I have always had a little bit of aversion to Franco as most of
his movies annoy rather than entertain me but this movie had the opposite
effect. I used to write off everything that Franco did as a zoom-happy
boring exploitation movie. "The Blood Of Fu Manchu" is not
boring and the camera contains itself enough to be able to tell a fairly linear
story that was entertaining and fun. An unrecognizable Christopher Lee
stars as the title character who has plans for world domination and launches the
first phase with a group of ten women who are carriers of snake venom that is
administered with a kiss. One of the first victims is Manchu's enemy
Nayland Smith who is poisoned and realizes that the blindness that the poison
caused in him will soon lead to death. Naturally, Nayland sets out to find
Fu Manchu in the jungles of Brazil. Once there he hooks up with explorer
Carl Jansen (Gotz George), a beautiful nurse (Maria Rohm from Franco's
"Eugenie" and "Justine"), and a bandit named Sancho Lopez
(Ricardo Palocios) who reminded me of a drunk and obnoxious Sallah from the
Indiana Jones series. I saw a lot of early-Bond similarities (including a
cameo by the gold girl from "Goldfinger" Shirley Eaton) in this
movie which combined the spy, adventure, action, and exploitation genres into
one. This was also known as "Kiss And Kill". I guess I can
no longer ignore certain movies just because Jess Franco directed them.
Now I will start seeking them out (at least until I see another "Lust For
Frankenstein" at which point I will be very unimpressed again).
The Trial Of Billy Jack
(1974)
This is Billy Jack on an epic scale. There are big swooping helicopter
shots, more fight scenes, more kung fu, a more ambitious script and a running
time of nearly three hours. Does it work? Well, I think it does as I
am a big fan of the Billy Jack movies and I appreciate what Tom Laughlin and
Delores Taylor were trying to get across with these movies. Although some
may feel that the beliefs of the writers are too preachy, I say all the power to
them as the Billy Jack movies are hardcore indie movies where the filmmakers
have total control and can do or say whatever the hell they feel like.
They leave it up to the viewer to make his or her own decision. A lot of
the themes from the original are expanded in this one including the corruption
of the US government, the treatment of native Americans, bigotry, and anti-war
movements. The thing I liked about this movie and it's predecessor is that
it made me think about my own beliefs and the way that I act towards people and
I think it may have changed my personality in a positive way even if
it was just by a small amount. For a movie to do that and be an
entertaining action/drama at the same time is a feat that is rarely
accomplished. I also want to add that I do not think Hollywood
should be making the current effort to update the Billy Jack movies. I
believe that Laughlin and Taylor had a really ballsy way of bringing their
vision to the screen in 70's that I don't think studios are able to match
today. The studios are too concerned with making money than with making a
point. I think more people should revisit the originals and maybe people
will learn something. The character of Carol was played by Laughlin and
Taylor's real life daughter Teresa Kelly. I also noticed that the young
Laughlin reminded me a lot of Joe Rogan from the TV show "Fear
Factor".
Hard Core Logo (1996)
When this movie came out, I saw it four times in it's two week theatrical
run. I thought the concept of what on the surface seems like a punk rock
Spinal Tap was executed brilliantly with more drama than it's predecessor.
Hugh Dillon (frontman for Canadian rock band The Headstones) stars as Joe Dick,
the singer of the legendary punk band Hard Core Logo. Joe gets the band
back together to play a benefit show for Bucky Haight (Julian Richings who
played one of the hillbilly monsters in "Wrong Turn"), a punk legend
who was shot and who lost his legs. After this successful show, Joe
convinces the band to embark on a five city tour of Western Canada with a film
crew in tow to document the experience. What follows is a loud, beer
soaked, rock and roll movie with brilliant performances by all band
members. I remember when this came out a lot of people thought this was a
documentary about a real band. The soundtrack rocks, the internal band
drama is fairly realistic, and although the movie has some funny moments, it is
essentially a character driven film and ends up being nothing like Spinal
Tap. Callum Keith Rennie (who seems to be in all the great Canadian
movies) plays the fame-seeking guitarist Billy Tallent, John Pyper-Ferguson is
the schizophrenic off-his-meds bass player John Oxenberger, and Bernie Coulson
is the simple yet likeable drummer Pipefitter. This was the last of a
string of great movies from Canadian director Bruce McDonald including
"Highway 61", "Roadkill", and "Dance Me
Outside". I hope he can find his way again and bring us more great
movies that I know he has in him. Also look for appearances from punk band
D.O.A, Art Bergmann, and Joey Ramone. There is a soundtrack
available as well as a lame 'tribute' to Hard Core Logo. This movie is one
of my all time favorites.
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